Sunday, August 25, 2013

Get off my soapbox!

Once in a blue moon I get the urge to talk one of the forbidden subjects, i.e. politics, religion, sex.  Most of the time I find it easily suppressible with a good knitting project and a glass of wine or several.  And then I got bogged down in 1930s tunic sweater (which is going to end up 1980s midriff sweater at the rate I'm going) and started getting distracted by Facebook.  It turns out (to borrow a Douglas Adams-ism) that I've got a lot of very politically minded Facebook friends.  You get those too?  The ones that really don't post at all except to rant about gun laws and race relations and birth control and Obamacare (that's for those of us who live stateside, by the way--the rest of you can just point and laugh if you want to)?  This is my answer to them.  Disclaimer, please stop reading if you are easily offended and/or just wanted to get into the knitting pretty pretty please.

Anyhoo, obviously I'm not one to talk as an American.  I was born outside the country, grew up with my ears full of Chinese idioms and my belly full of rice and stir-fry, and pretty much hung out with whoever didn't judge me by the slant of my eyes or my Oxford English vocabulary.  But if you want to get to know the very core of your country, you check with the people with the least amount of "foreign" influence.  The ones who haven't traveled outside the country--heck, probably haven't left the state if they could help it--who grew up in the same place generation after generation, and whose great-great-grandchildren will probably die on the same piece of land their ancestors were born on.  Horry County, SC, seems as reasonable a study population as any where that's concerned.  And taking an informal poll (readily volunteered, mind) of the more vocal locals (ooh, that was an awful rhyme if I ever heard one), this is what I've found.  Keeping in mind that this is in monetary terms, not idealistic ones, i.e. what will you shell out your hard-earned inflatable dollar for.  You taking notes, Mr. President?

The quintessential American does not want to pay for:
1) anything involving the word "government"
2) healthcare
3) sex ed/birth control/women's issues (still trying to figure out if "children" counts in this category or healthcare)
4) education
5) the arts
6) rainforests in Africa/South America, the hole in the ozone layer, insert latest environmental thingy here

The quintessential American will gladly pay for:
1) guns
2) oil (though at a reduced price like it used to be)
3) religion (do I add "fetuses" to this one, or is that a separate issue?)
4) sports
5) a standing army

On a related note (see category 2, number 4 above), anybody else wonder what would happen if we turned some of the bigger and more frustrating international summits into mud-wrestling matches?  For one thing, I think they'd get a bigger audience.

That might just about do it.  Should be a long while before I do this again, and seriously, I never judge a knitter by his/her political beliefs, so please extend me the same benefit of a doubt and ignore this post if you're easily offended.  And also, get off my soapbox!

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