Four and twenty blackbirds...

Or about 400 cranberries baked into a pie.  OK, probably more like 100, whatever makes up a roughly 1-lb bag.  Herein I record the dessert-making adventures of The Crafty Doctor and her comrade-in-arms, aka her sister's roommate.  Last weekend, while the sister was away at voice lessons or classes or studying for the bar or whatever ridiculously difficult accomplishments said sister is in the habit of acquiring, her roommate and I decided it was our afternoon/evening to cook.  Since sister dearest is allergic to practically everything that carries the name of fruit, we knew our options were limited.  C---- has been threatening to make pie for ages but hadn't gotten himself psyched up enough to do it.  I'd made pie from scratch once before (ever) and rather enjoyed it.  Recipe?  We don't need no stinkin' recipe.

The following is an exact recipe of what we made.  Do not follow it to the letter unless you want your pie to be sour--SOUR, I tell you!  In parentheses are changes I'm probably going to make to the recipe if I ever make it again.  Assume American standard terminology.

Pie crust:
2-1/2 cups all-purpose flour (generally I do 3, since the 3-2-1 rule's easier to remember)
2 sticks unsalted butter, cut into approx 1cm slices
1 cup water
1/2 to 2 teaspoons sugar or salt to taste

Cranberry filling
approx 3 cups fresh cranberries
2/3 cup sugar (make that 3/4 cup in the revised version)
zest of 1 lemon
juice of 1/2 lemon (please decrease/leave this out for your poor tongue's sake)
1 teaspoon ground ginger (alternatively, 1 tablespoon ginger simple syrup and decrease sugar back to 2/3 cup)
1/2 teaspoon ground cloves
1 to 2 tablespoons corn starch for thickening

Combine flour, butter, and sugar/salt for pie crust in food processor and pulse until small balls form (I prefer to hand-mix my dough, which makes a tenderer, less flaky crust probably due to larger fat particles but can be a little harder to roll out later).  Add water approximately 1 tablespoon at a time and mix until dough forms.  Divide into 2 balls and refrigerate, approx 20 min to 1 hour.

Preheat oven to 375 degrees (Fahrenheit.  Y'all can calculate Centigrade by subtracting 32 and multiplying by 5/9 if you really want to).  In a large mixing bowl, combine cranberries, lemon juice (if used), lemon zest, sugar, ginger, and cloves.  Toss until cranberries are well-coated.  Add corn starch and stir until mixture starts to thicken.

Roll out pie dough onto floured surface.  Spread 1 round evenly onto bottom of pie plate.  Pour in cranberry filling.  Place second pastry round over the top, shape edges as desired, and trim off excess pastry.  Pierce top of pastry with fork or knife.  Try a decorative pattern, or a joke (pi!).

Bake in oven approximately 1 hour, checking periodically.  If pastry browns too quickly around the edges, cover with aluminum foil.

Remove from oven.  Serve warm or chilled.  Consider adding a dollop of cream-like substance (ice or whipped).  Enjoy.  I dare you.  Makes one 9-inch round pie.

There, I've done it.  Bwa-ha-ha!  Kitchen experiments FTW!